When you set out to wreak mayhem, don’t forget the important things

This morning, a young woman got on the light rail a few stops after I did. She had pink & blue hair and the kind of colorful swirly skirt & tights getup you’d expect from that description – well, that people in Portland expect. She also carried a folded tripod and what appeared to be an M-4 assault rifle. Closer inspection of the latter revealed that it appeared to be a replica – the spray-on glitter was a subtle clue here. Still, it was a pretty convincing replica at first glance. Nobody said a word.

Her problem, as it turned out, was not her choice of fireams, it was that she neglected to buy a ticket. Yes, we had a fare inspector aboard who was working his way through the car. A few minutes after he got to Ms Pink and Blue, I heard the ominous radio crackle which means only one thing to a seasoned mass transit rider – she had no proof of fare, and the inspector was calling it in.

Let that be a lesson to all you would-be mass shooters: you can carry your M-4 on light rail, but don’t forget your fare.

Love on the Westside Express

On my morning trip on the commuter rail, I often see a couple of young women traveling together. They keep to themselves, occasionally leaning against each other and speaking in low voices. Usually, though, they just snuggle and doze. They are clearly crazy about each other in their low-profile way.

Seeing them reminds me of John 13:34, where Christ says,“As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” What makes me sad is that some people who profess to follow Christ would be angered by this sight, simply because it is two women. Love is love, to my mind. These two aren’t telling me how to live, they are merely trying to protect each other and stay warm in a cold world. We can never have too much of that kind of devotion.

No, you can’t do anything you set out to do, but…

One of the lies that people like to tell kids is “you can do anything you want to, if you really set your mind to it.” This is patently absurd. You can’t flap your arms and fly like a bird – believe me, I really wanted to do that. You can’t look at someone you don’t like and make them catch fire. You can’t make the Earth spin backwards and reverse time. (That’s a good thing, in my book.) This knowledge of your own limits may be depressing, to be sure. But think about it — the set of all possible actions is so incredibly large and dazzling that you should thank the Lord for keeping it from becoming infinite.

Here is the thing that kids should be told, over and over — you can do far more than you think you can. If you do find something you really want to do and that looks like it might be possible, understand that it probably won’t be easy. I am ashamed at the occasions when I have declined to attempt something difficult out of simple fear or discouragement, and yet I have managed to amaze myself time and time again by the things that I did accomplish. Give it a shot and don’t be discouraged by initial failure – that’s the real secret. You’ll be amazed at what happens.

A prayer for the mass-transit rider

Lord, protect us from those of brass voice and feather brain. Please keep those who chatter and bray from becoming our seatmate. If worse comes to worse and we are forced into proximity, let us have patience enough not to succumb to the temptation to deal out physical violence or even snappy remarks, however much the fool may deserve to be corrected. Though we are tempted also to pray for these people to be struck with laryngitis, let us understand that karma decrees that we shall also be sickened after they breathe on us.

Lord, help us to accept that the best we can do is to ask for swift, safe travel to our destination, and to appreciate how blessed we are that we don’t have to live or work with these people. All this we pray in the mighty name of your son, Jesus Christ.

10 things I did that you have probably not done

This was inspired by a post from John Scalzi (whatever.scalzi.com), who listed 10 interesting and unusual incidents from his life, and invited his readers to do the same. Here is my list:

* Rode on an ancient helicopter full of Marines, careening wildly at tree-top level.
* Recovered the corpse of a man who had drowned… four days prior. You wouldn’t believe the colors unless you saw it yourself.
* Broke my wrist playing cornerback in an American football game, then played the rest of the game.
* Watched in horror as my eight-year-old daughter accosted Steve Jobs on the show floor of MacWorld. (I was an Apple employee at the time.)
* Stayed in a house whose original timbers were laid in 1370. (It was my grandparents’ home in Sweden.)
* Wrote a program for the original Macintosh that sold eight copies.
* Carried buckets of water from the stream behind our house so we could use the bathroom. (The power was out to the well.)
* Did a voiceover appearance as Dan Rather reporting on a protest involving a giant condom stretched over the rotunda of a state capitol. (I still remember the phrase ‘enormous prophylactic’.)
* Had a recruiter call me to ask if I knew anything about Apple Help, and I replied that I wrote the book. (I did, too.)
* Had a cooling hose blow out in my car as I traveled down US 101 in California. I watched the cloud of steam streaming from under the hood as the temp climbed on the gauge. I pulled over, waited for the steam to dissipate, said “Please, Lord, let me get home.” Whereupon the temp immediately dropped back into the normal range and I was able to drive the three miles home without mishap or apparent damage to the car. (Yes, I replaced the hose and refilled the coolant.)

9 days late but worth the wait

Image

Please welcome my newest granddaughter, Sophie Lynn Troll, born yesterday in Santa Maria, California. She arrived at a healthy seven pounds, nine ounces, and twenty inches long. Showing that she shares her mother’s firmness of purpose, she refused to appear simply because some doctor set an arbitrary date; she was eventually convinced that we really wanted to meet her, however. Once with us, she also showed that she shares her mother’s sweet nature and startling good looks.

Swedish custom demands that I point out that her last name is Norwegian, which just goes to show that no one is perfect. :^) She is a marvelous gift and we thank the Lord that she and her mother are both doing very well. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I got a good night’s sleep for the first time in days. Huzzay!

A brief observation while riding on the 12 bus

There are some obvious benefits to taking public transit, as well as drawbacks. I could do without the shouters and the crazy monologues, for instance; if I was driving, I could just turn off talk radio. But last night, I saw a new chapter in a story I would not have known about if I was isolated in a car.

The last leg of my morning commute is the 12 bus from Tigard Transit Center. One of the stops on Barbur Blvd. usually brings us a handful of students on their way to Wilson High School. Last school year I got used to seeing the same faces and hearing their chatter as they boarded. When school started up last month, I noticed one of the regulars was not among them. This youngster was an energetic dark-haired girl who liked to sit with one of the other girls and gossip giddily. When the students returned from last winter break, I saw her downcast face and teased her about it, which made her smile for a second. Anyway, I figured she must have graduated and didn’t think any more of it.

I saw her last night as I took the 12 on my way home, but I hardly recognized her. She was dressed as though she was coming home from a job where clothes are important. Her complexion was cleared up and her hair was well-styled. She carried herself differently, too. In short, she looked a lot more like a young woman now. The changes made me smile, and (not for the first time) I was glad that I get to ride the 12.

Sunday morning in Portlandia

I took the light rail early Sunday morning so I could do a bit of grocery shopping. I saw three incidents which provide a fairly representative snapshot of life in the Portland metro area:

1. As I waited for the eastbound train to arrive, I watched a lady being dropped off so she could go to the airport. She was a sturdy, white-haired gal with one of those big rolling bags with a telescoping handle. From her questions, it was clear she had never gone to the airport this way before, but she was pretty cheerful about a challenge that makes a lot of people nervous. A nice older gent with a walking stick answered her questions and saw that she boarded safely. As we headed down the line, I saw him exit and I was a bit surprised to discover that he didn’t appear to know the woman; he just wanted to help her.

2. As we approached downtown Beaverton, I saw cops standing near temporary barriers, redirecting traffic away from a closed street. As the train made the next crossing, I saw a group of runners with race numbers on their singlets, chatting and waiting patiently for the train to pass so they could continue their race.

3. As we continued to Beaverton Transit Center, I saw a man slumped in his seat, with all his possessions piled around him. He woke up long enough to vomit on himself, then curled up again.

This is the real Portlandia, people, in all its glory.

Sinning differently

Those who follow sports news are probably aware that NBA player Jason Collins caused a stir this week by coming out as gay in an article in Sports Illustrated. I know a few folks who are upset by this and are very likely to point fingers at this man and condemn his action. My reaction is to quote two passages of Scripture (these are from the NIV):
Romans 2:1
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
John 8:7
He straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

My pastor pointed out that we often fall into the practice of pointing fingers at those who sin differently than we do, but the truth is that we all fall short of the glory of God and we all need grace. I don’t feel competent to state definitively how the Lord will judge anyone and I have great skepticism for anyone who claims otherwise.

We should all be so unlucky

A young woman from my alma mater by the name of Aly Beebe is in her freshman year at Stanford University. She was a basketball superstar in high school, leading St. Joseph to a state championship (which, in California, is seriously difficult – the best high school girls’ team I ever saw never even made it to the finals.) I checked some box scores early in the season this year and found, to my dismay, that she was not getting into games. What I found out eventually is that she is ‘red-shirting’ this season, which means she is on the roster, practices and travels with the team, but does not play in games and (this is the key) does not use up one of her four seasons of eligibility. This made some sense, finally; Stanford is one of the deepest, most talented teams in the world of women’s college basketball and they have an amazing player named Chiney Ogwumike who plays the same position as Aly. (Here  is a good article about Chiney that appears on the sfgate.com site.)

After learning about this situation, I was actually foolish enough to feel sorry for Aly. I really wanted to see her play on the big stage. But the article on Chiney dumped a bucket of reality over my head, metaphorically speaking, and woke me up to the following:

1. Aly (an excellent student) is getting an education at a world-class university (free!) where she has the opportunity to take classes such as those described in the article.

2. She gets a year to adjust to a very different world from a small high school in the suburbs. As a point of comparison, the gym at St. Joe’s is probably smaller than the coach’s offices at Stanford.

3. She practices with and against players like Chiney every day in practice. She learns the plays, the defenses, and the work ethic that she’ll need for next year.

Not a bad deal, I think. I’ll just have to be patient and wait for my chance to see her shine.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.